Happy Ever After

I am not one to pick favorites. In fact, my favorites of anything (color, music genre, food, etc) are constantly changing. But today, I wanted to talk about today's favorite musical: Into the Woods, music and lyrics by Stephen Sondheim and book by James Lapine. There are many things I love about this musical, but the one that keeps me coming back is that I learn something new ever single time I listen to or watch it.

Call me crazy, but I liken musicals to my life just as much as the scriptures. Today, I've listened to the Into the Woods soundtrack three times, and I found myself seriously connecting with the character of Cinderella. It's interesting to note that last time I auditioned for this show, Cinderella was the last part I wanted. At the time, I felt like her character was stereotypical and it wouldn't be a challenge to play. I can say now that I was completely wrong about her. She and I are a lot more alike than I thought. 

In the beginning of the play, she goes to her mother's grave for help and she says, "What is wrong with me, Mother? Something must be wrong." This phrase really hit me today, with all of the inner turmoil of the upcoming decisions in my life... when things aren't going particularly well, I revert back to feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem. At these times I really do feel like something must be wrong with me. Cinderella doesn't see her good qualities very clearly, because in her mind her flaws outweigh all other attributes. To us outsiders, she is wonderful. She has lost the only person that really loved her (her mother); her father is there, but non-supportive; and she suffers everyday at the hand of her step-family, and yet she still continues on. She is beautiful, talented, kind, people-oriented, and intelligent. So, how can she possibly feel inadequate?

If you really look at the words of her songs, this girl is hesitant to make a choice. The Baker's Wife asks Cinderella if the Prince is everything she's ever wanted, and she replies, "but how can you know what you want until you get what you want and you see if you like it." I am having those same feelings at this point in my life. Then, in the number "On the Steps of the Palace" we hear Cinderella's inner dialogue about how she came to leave her shoe on the stairs for the Prince to find. She weighs both options and their possible outcomes, but neither choice outshines the other... so she decides not to decide. She leaves the choice-making up to the Prince. Oh, how I understand Cinderella's frustration here. The choices that stand before me right now are daunting and life-changing... and I don't want to be responsible for the outcome! I wish that the right decision was clear, I wish that I could let someone else make the choices for me, I wish that I could run away from the whole responsibility... but I can't. Cinderella let someone else decide and her life was a relatively happy one, but eventually the Prince cheated on her and she was left alone again. Of course, this isn't a one time lesson to learn; Cinderella learns over and over again throughout the play that the choices are hers. I'm sure that if we were to see the story continue on after the curtain comes down, we would see her struggle with this again and again.

My favorite song in the musical (of course, this one changes as well), is "No One is Alone." Here, Cinderella and the Baker and comforting Little Red and Jack during a moment of darkness, suspense, and uncertainty. I feel like Cinderella really grows up during this number. There is someone who needs comfort more than she does, so she puts aside her own needs to teach and comfort another (Little Red). I believe that Cinderella is truly speaking from the heart, drawing on her life choices, and examining her own life. I'm hoping that soon I will be able to grow up like that.

The best thing about Into the Woods is the happy ending. Argue with me all you want, but I see a bight outlook at the end of this musical. Yes, people are hurt or killed, and it's not your typical "happily ever after", but life isn't like that either. The show ends with the Baker ready to teach his son with the knowledge that he gained in the woods, everyong sings about what they've learned, and the Baker even says, "I think I see a glimmer." Life has a lot of ups and downs, and you never really know what will happen, but you can always know that you can learn from it, and that the darkness will not last forever. There are countless "happy endings" in our lives... and then the next trial or experience comes and we trudge through it to the next "happy ending". Hope is not lost, and no one is alone.

So, do you see why I love musicals so much?!

The Importance of Being... Awesome!

You know, I thought when I graduated college that I would have more free time, and I wouldn't feel so busy... I was very wrong. Although I am participating in fewer activities, they are taking up more time than the many activities I was doing before. Just a few short months ago I was going to school full time, working part time, performing in a show (which I had to commute an hour to), constructing 5 full costumes for said show, and trying to squeeze in homework (trying to graduate), practicum hours, and my church calling. People would ask me all the time how I could possibly do so much, and I can honestly say it almost killed me, and I was pretty numb by graduation, but I made it! Now that school isn't in the equation, I figured that I would have time to do more for myself, but I didn't realize that having a full time job would take up more of my week than all of those other things before. I'm only working, directing a show, and fulfilling my church calling; but I think I'm just as mentally and emotionally exhausted as before. But everything will work out, just like it did before. I have hope.


Don't misunderstand me, I really love my life right now. I finally feel like an independent adult: working full time, paying for my own living, and making my own decisions completely; and I love that! I am directing my first show, which is super exciting, if not absolutely terrifying... but we just had our first meeting and our get-to-know-you rehearsal, so we're not quite into the process yet. I have been making and developing amazing friendships lately, and these friends have been a real strength to me during this difficult time in my life. When I lay out the blessings that I have and really look at them, I can see that I have no reason to complain or to be unhappy. Life is really good, despite all of the recent confusion and heartache I've experienced. I'm not alone, and I have full faith that everything will be fine.

The thing that has been filling all of my thoughts and dreams lately has been The Importance of Being Earnest. Many months ago, I found out that the direct for the the Fall slot at The Old Barn Community Theatre would be moving away, and that they were looking for someone to direct the straight play, I jumped at the opportunity. I told the Board that I would soon be graduating from Weber State with my Bachelor or Arts in Musical Theatre, and I that I would love to have the chance to direct a full production. They took me on! I began looking for a straight comedy back in March (or even earlier, I was really excited), and I kept coming back to The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde. This was the first play that I read just for the sake of reading a show, back when I was in junior high or high school, and I thought it was hilarious! I didn't think much of it after that point, other than watching the Collin Firth, Rupert Everret movie version every once in a while; but when the time came to choose a show, this one really spoke to me.

Once we decided to start ironing out the details of how we were going to put on this show, my assistant director gave a brilliant suggestion: set it in the 1920s. Genius, I know. He always is. It will be a different production from other Earnests, it will be easier to find costumes and set pieces, and we have the freedom to add a few interesting things (our Algernon is learning how to play the Ukulele!). I couldn't be more excited about the concept! What makes this whole thing even more exciting was the talent that came out to auditions last week. I am happy to say that casting was extremely difficult, because everyone was good! I didn't want to loose anyone that came out... but alas, even with the parts we added to the show, there are only 12 cast members. But these 12 people have so much talent, I have no doubts that they will all work hard to make this show as wonderful as I see in my mind!

I will post the show dates, times, and location when the event is closer. I want to share this beauty with everyone!